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Monday, July 19, 2010

My flawless future business plan.


I have not, nor will I ever use or sell drugs, especially not to Japanese politicians to cause a downfall in their government. This conversation came around because my dear friend Claudina and I were talking about how we both have no idea where our degrees will take us and we fear for our futures. She is taking a double degree in science and arts (Japanese) and I am taking a degree in biomedical science with statistics and psychology. This conversation happened on MSN and has been edited to make it more readable and many instances where we were laughing at our own jokes have been removed.

Ojaye: I wonder if we'd ever start a business together
We could do an international science business and travel the world with my Statistics and your Japanese,
selling ecstacy to Presidents and Prime Ministers

Claudina: LMAO
sounds like a plan

Ojaye: then we can take it away from them suddenly and I can provide counselling services
then you can write reports on the downfall of modern Japan due to drug problems in the Government
we can sell it for millions
or the government will bribe us to withold its release

Claudina: we'll be rich, we'll be out and st petersburg will have some more to talk abouttt~~

Ojaye: we'll take the bribe and then "accidentally" release a copy of the report to the black market for a small fortune
then we can sue the people in the underground who released it for even more money!
CLAUDINA I'M A GENIUS

Claudina: yes you are
I'm in

Ojaye: We may need someone with a law degree
I know a guy
well he doesn't have one yet
but he's in first year

Claudina: a few more years

Ojaye: yeah
don't worry, we can work the kinks out of my perfect plan in that time
I reckon we'd be a pretty good team in the workforce
I could imagine us in like.. a really stylish boardroom
have you ever seen the movie "Old Dogs"?

Claudina: ....
I can't say I have

Ojaye: Ok well its a movie with John Travolta and Robin Williams and they're business men
and they're trying to do this huge deal with these Japanese businessmen
and the boardroom in Japan is so sexy
it's got a whole wall of windows and it's pretty
and we'll be there
talking about ecstacy and government

Claudina: are you basing our future plan on a movie?

Ojaye: No but when I was talking about it , the movie came to mind
How dare you accuse me of such unprofessional behaviour!
basing our future on a movie
Pah!

Claudina: pah pah pah

The conversation immediately turned into one about internet shopping and dresses. We are easily distracted by pretty things. If you're curious as to how the conversation changed so suddenly, it happened like this:
 
Ojaye: I really love that dress I showed you

I think I'll measure myself

Claudina: lol xD
the clothes on there are nice

Ojaye: OMG
MY BOOBS ARE 88cm!
This was too big for the dress.

“I have nothing to declare but this opium”

- Oscar Wilde on airport protocol (Might actually be from here.)

1 comments:

The Travelling Bee said...

BOOOBIES!!! WOW YOUR BOOBS ARE THRICE MY SIZE (is thrice a word?)